Fruition

Part I: A Light Twist

Dear Neighbor,

Jay loaded your grocery order into my car last week. He didn’t mean to; it was an honest error. But when I got home and called, he directed me to keep or donate your food. In the spirit of the season, I whipped up a little something with your groceries.

Enjoy:

On the first day of Christmas,
Express Lane gave to me:
A sad and lonely gold banana.

On the second day of Christmas,
Express Lane gave to me:
Two limes for twisting,
And a sad and lonely gold banana.

On the third day of Christmas,
Express Lane gave to me:
Three turkey pepperonis,
Two limes for twisting,
And a sad and lonely gold banana.

On the fourth day of Christmas,
Express Lane gave to me:
A four pack of Siggi’s Mixed Berry Yogurt,
Three turkey pepperonis,
Two limes for twisting,
And a sad and lonely gold banana.

On the fifth day of Christmas,
Express Lane gave to me:
Fiiiiiiive Caesar Salad kits,
A four pack of Siggi’s Mixed Berry Yogurt,
Three turkey pepperonis,
Two limes for twisting,
And a sad and lonely gold banana.

On the sixth day of Christmas,
Express Lane gave to me:
A six pack of club soda,
Fiiiiiiive Caesar Salad kits,
A four pack of Siggi’s Mixed Berry Yogurt,
Three turkey pepperonis,
Two limes for twisting,
And a sad and lonely gold banana.

On the seventh day of Christmas,
Express Lane gave to me:
Seven ounces of Tom’s Wicked Cool Natural Toothpaste,
A six pack of club soda,
Fiiiiiiive Caesar Salad kits,
A four pack of Siggi’s Mixed Berry Yogurt,
Three turkey pepperonis,
Two limes for twisting,
And a sad and lonely gold banana.

On the eighth day of Christmas,
Express Lane gave to me:
Eight mandarin oranges,
Seven ounces of Tom’s Wicked Cool Natural Toothpaste,
A six pack of club soda,
Fiiiiiiive Caesar Salad kits,
A four pack of Siggi’s Mixed Berry Yogurt,
Three turkey pepperonis,
Two limes for twisting,
And a sad and lonely gold banana

On the ninth day of Christmas,
Express Lane gave to me:
Nine Honeycrisp apples,
Eight mandarin oranges,
Seven ounces of Tom’s Wicked Cool Natural Toothpaste,
A six pack of club soda,
Fiiiiiiive Caesar Salad kits,
A four pack of Siggi’s Mixed Berry Yogurt,
Three turkey pepperonis,
Two limes for twisting,
And a sad and lonely gold banana.

On the tenth day of Christmas,
Express Lane gave to me:
Ten pouches Annie’s Fruit Friends organic apple fruit sauce,
Nine Honeycrisp apples,
Eight mandarin oranges,
Seven ounces of Tom’s Wicked Cool Natural Toothpaste,
A six pack of club soda,
Fiiiiiiive Caesar Salad kits,
A four pack of Siggi’s Mixed Berry Yogurt,
Three turkey pepperonis,
Two limes for twisting,
And a sad and lonely gold banana.

On the eleventh day of Christmas,
Express Lane gave to me:
Eleven…… [screeching halt of record needle] nothing comes in an 11 of anything,
Ten pouches Annie’s Fruit Friends organic apple fruit sauce,
Nine Honeycrisp apples,
Eight mandarin oranges,
Seven ounces of Tom’s Wicked Cool Natural Toothpaste,
A six pack of club soda,
Fiiiiiiive Caesar Salad kits,
A four pack of Siggi’s Mixed Berry Yogurt,
Three turkey pepperonis,
Two limes for twisting,
And a sad and lonely gold banana.

On the twelfth day of Christmas,
Express Lane gave to me:
Twelve Sunmaid mini box raisins,
Eleven….. [crickets],
Ten pouches Annie’s Fruit Friends organic apple fruit sauce,
Nine Honeycrisp apples,
Eight mandarin oranges,
Seven ounces of Tom’s Wicked Cool Natural Toothpaste,
A six pack of club soda,
Fiiiiiiive Caesar Salad kits,
A four pack of Siggi’s Mixed Berry Yogurt,
Three turkey pepperonis,
Two limes for twisting,
And a sad and lonely gold banana.

Part II: Outakes aka Loot Left Out of the Lyrics

1 English cucumber
2 pounds of strawberries
2 Girard’s Salad Dressing
1 pack Firehook Baked Mediterranean crackers
1 pack Carb Counter Lg Flour Tortillas
12 pack Cheez-its bags
2 bottles of olive oil
1 Party Size Kettle Brand Sea Salt and Vinegar Chips
24 pack HT brand String cheese
16 sticks Country Archer Provisions grass-fed mini beef sticks
1 pk Shiitake mushrooms
1 bag baby petite carrots
1 bag Shredded carrots
1 wedge Caramella cheese
2 packs Canadian bacon

I can tell a lot about this order’s intended owner by the items we received.

But I remain stumped by the sad and lonely gold banana amid the opulent cheese and crackers, fancy French dressing, and grass-fed beef sticks (this makes me lol - the sticks were fed grass?).

It was probably just an accident; mom probably typed in “banana” as she online shopped and forgot to indicate a quantity higher than “1”. This rookie mistake is one I scripted.

(Maybe she meant to order 11 bananas which would have fixed my 👆 song?)

Part III: A Slightly Deeper Dive

Perhaps he was not sad or lonely at all.

Perhaps he is a beacon of purity and simplicity amid SouthPark crowds, Amazon boxes, and Lulu Lycra.

Space in the vast chaos of worldness to just be small and very okay.

A banana and the Christ Child both suggest…. Perfection.
Christ, as scripture suggests, is the fruit of the Holy Spirit.

Do I imply that The Second Coming happened in my cozy Cotswold kitchen in the form of a banana via another family’s Express Lane order from Harris Teeter?

It could also be the fruition of Seuss’ The Grinch Who Stole Christmas: “It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags.”

Perhaps it’s just this simple chiquita’s way of finding a little Christmas in unexpected places…

Merry Merry, my FOAT friends!!!!